No Love From the Home Team

My Titans are shunning the likes of me and all other fans in the Memphis area, by not making their annual Titans Caravan stop here open to the public. I must say, I've looked forward to it every year, as it pretty much exists as the only opportunity that the average person can meet a couple of players and have them sign your memorabilia--in my case, a mini-helmet--unless you hang out at gas stations in Nashville in the early morning, like Pac-Man Jones, waiting for gunfire or something. Anyway, the first year I went was in 2002, and it was held in the court area of Wolfchase Galleria (I didn't take any pictures that year). They've been to the O'Charley's in Bartlett (I was actually on the front page of the sports section of the Commercial Appeal the next day. Not me exclusively, but standing in line waiting). The next year, it was O'Charley's in Cordova AND the Lowe's on Winchester. Last year, it was back to the Galleria. Anyway, the players I've met in the last 4 years are:

• Chris Sanders
• John Thornton
• Fred Miller
• Jevon Kearse
• Albert Haynesworth
• Tyrone Calico
• Drew Bennett
• Troy Fleming

I had been watching the schedule over at the Titans Radio site, and was a bit confused by the listing for Memphis: 2:45-5:15 Join the Team Work Party. Radio partner is 98.1 The Max, but their site provided no insight. And now, according to the Titans' official site, the players on the West Tennessee leg will be Zach Piller and Robert Reynolds, but the event is at the Southside Boys and Girls Club and is not open to the public.

I'm all for community service stuff and all that, but Memphis is probably the biggest city outside of Nashville that they're going to. They've always gone to schools and stuff, but I'm just surprised, and a bit disappointed, that they couldn't see fit to let the public in on it. In years past, Memphis has been an overnight stop, but this year I think they're heading to Jackson for one more gig that night. Turnout has always been pretty good, but in my opinion it has the opportunity to be greater if it were more publicized. I mean, sure, true fans who know about the annual gig and watch the schedule know about it, but if it were on the news or in the paper or advertised in places like Foot Locker or Finish Line (i.e, places that sell their jerseys), maybe they'd pick up some people that otherwise wouldn't have known about it.

Pipe Dreams

Am I demented, a little crazy, irrational, or just plain normal?

First of all, I haven't gone and done anything stupid. I haven't drained a bank account, or run up a credit card balance. Nothing like that. And I'm wondering if recent thoughts will flee over time, or if it's something that, through information gathering, will only get more intense.

They say that the only difference between men and boys is the price of their toys. (I can see ALL of you.....Figuratively scratching your head, waiting for the first little clue, thinking to yourself, "Where in the *&^$#!? is he going with this?!). For the most part, I really don't have any vices, in my opinion, when it comes to stuff like spending money or hobbies or stuff like that. I don't spend insane amounts of money on a 1950's baseball card that I've been wanting. I don't go out and shop for $200 rims or other shiny accessories for my TrailBlazer. And even though I do play golf occasionally, the extent of my golf-related purchases is usually a $15 pack of balls at Wal-Mart and not the $350 latest and greatest driver at Double Eagle.

A guy that I work with at Kroger, Ben, is a lot like me. Young. Wants a successful future. He's 25, and single, but that's the not parallel I'm trying to draw. He's worked at a bank, as a head teller. He considered going into Kroger management, but will probably end up finishing school. Anyway (I promise I'm going somewhere with this), Ben recently inherited some money that was set aside by his grandmother several years ago. Aside from plans to advance his education, you wanna know what Ben bought for himself? A motorcycle. Not the annoying "crotch rocket" types that you see weaving in traffic, almost wishing it'd slide off into the ditch (ooohh, did I say that out loud?). He treated himself to a Honda "cruising" bike similar one of these.

I must admit, when he told me that he was buying it, I was a bit surprised--he didn't really strike me as the motorcycle type. But then again, what exactly IS the "motorcycle type?" I'm not talking Harley-Davidson-driving, 300-lb dude with the beard, and the sticker on the half-helmet that says, "If you can read this, the bitch fell off." Are they people who've been around them? Their dad have one? Or does hanging out with people who have them kind of create the 'buzz'? Did God hard-code it into every male's DNA, waiting to be discovered or forever repressed?

Here's a synopsis of my experiences with motorized cycles in general. When I was in junior high, a classmate (of whose house, yard, etc I was usually envious--we all had them) got a Honda Elite scooter (Carter Jennings, for those from R.E.). He took me for a ride, and I was hooked. Starving for the independence of self-provided transportation, I was 14 and on a mission. I told myself I'd save up my money and buy myself a scooter (which never happened).

My mom had a guy-friend that had a Goldwing, which Ben describes as a the Cadillac of bikes ("There is no better ride than on a Goldwing"). One time he was at the house, and mom let him take me out on a ride. Helmet in place, we jumped on the interstate and before I know it, it seemed like we were going 55 MPH (we were actually doing 70, I think). What a rush!. A lot like riding in/driving a convertible--it was a cool summer night, and the weather was perfect. Wind blowing every ounce of hair and clothes, but you just don't care.

Then, out of the blue, several years ago my very own brother buys a bike. A Kawasaki Vulcan. He had never really been "into" motorcycles (that I was aware of), and he seemed to really, really enjoy the heck out of it. He recently sold his bike (or exchanged it for crack cocaine or a Volkswagen Golf, I'm not sure), but Erik still has his (but it's a bit under the weather, I hear). Brad said the other day that Dad recently said, "Erik needs to get his bike fixed so I can take it to work." Uhhhh, OK. My 60-year old Dad (wait, sorry...59 'til September) cruising up on 2-wheeler. I've seen Dad drive a ski-boat, a pontoon boat, a riding lawn mower, and classic Mustang. But never motorcycle.

So....What do you think? You guys: Is it in all of us? Is all we need a little extra dough for a new/used/hand-me-down/garage sale bike, and the OK from our spouse to get in touch with our inner self? You women: What if your dude came home and said, I'm not wanting to drag-race down at the industrial park, but I think I'd like a cruising motorcycle to go riding with (insert friends names here)?

It's a little known fact that my maternal grandfather, Harry White (who died when I was in the 3rd grade) was at one time the owner of Harry's Suzuki on Summer Ave. So obviously it's somewhere in my blood. Hopefully I'm about to have a garage, some medical bills paid off, and a little more time once I quit Kroger. Ben's already told me that he'd go riding with me. . .

The Governor's Balls . . . and Sauna, and Windows, and Bathtub

So the Governor and his wife, who have never lived in the Executive mansion, are auctioning off several items that are getting the decorative axe over at Govdeals.com, a site that I had never really heard of. Personally, I was eyeing the set of pool balls, as our new house will have a bonus room that has been promised to me as Testosterone Kingdom (and I've already been pricing pool tables). I just thought that 1) I'd need an accessory set like this anyway, and 2) It'd be cool to say something like, "By the way, that rack of balls you're setting up used to be in the Governor's mansion. Seriously. No, really."

With stuff like this, there's always this self-imposed stupid line that you don't really wanna cross. I mean, no matter how cool it'd be, that would be directly cancelled out by having to admit you paid an insane amount of money for something you could've gotten for $25 at Wal-Mart. Wow, my pool balls are up to like 85 bucks as of this writing....I guess I'm gonna have to pass. There's always former Gov. Ned McWherter's jacuzzi tub. . . .

Crème Brûlée Can Never Be Jell-O

Congrats to my one and only, my favorite BancorpSouth teller, the mother of my child.......Leah!!!

One of the little incentive-type things that the bank has, that also serves as a measure of accountability for the tellers, is a regional teller award (1st, 2nd, and 3rd place) that is given out on a quarterly basis. It's not based on subjective secret shops or supervisor recommendation, or anything like that--it's all facts and stats. The award is a combination of your over/short, number of transactions processed, and image errors. So basically, if you're not terribly error prone, and you come to work to, uh, work, and you're thorough with your paperwork, it all comes down to how you stack up against every other teller at branches in the metro Memphis area, including (I believe) Olive Branch, Collierville, Germantown, Hernando, Bartlett, et. al.

Now, keep this in mind. Leah has been filling in as a CSR (the peeps that open accounts, sell CD's, etc) on occasion because she is trained in that position and they sometimes need her. She was out for 6 days in February with gall bladder issues and hospitalization. So while her likelihood of shorting somebody 100 bucks goes down drastically if she isn't there, so does her transaction count.

Leah has been told that she is one of the first quarter winners. She doesn't know which place it is yet, but 1st place gets her $500, 2nd is $250, and 3rd is $100. Regardless of her placement, the award is something to be proud of and is a testament to her dedication, worth ethic, and attention to detail.

Congratulations, Leah!!!

I Don't Get It

This is what frustrates me about all the CRAP that it seems we keep getting fed about oil and gas prices.

From an article on Foxnews.com less than a month ago:

U.S. oil inventories are at their highest in about seven years, due in part to a tide of imports in recent months, giving the world's biggest energy consumer a thick buffer against supply disruptions.

Today:

In its weekly report, the U.S. Energy Department said the nation's supply of gasoline shrank by 5.4 million barrels last week to 202.5 million barrels, or 4.6 percent below year ago levels. Gasoline inventories typically decrease this time of year as refiners shut down their plants to perform maintenance ahead of the summer driving season. And oil traders typically point to the decreases as reason for concern about summertime supplies, a routine that, more often than not, sends futures prices higher.

So let me see if I understand this--a month ago, our inventories were at the highest they've been since 1999. But now, you're suddenly 'scared' because our inventories dropped 4.6 % over last year. Oh, and refiners are doing a PLANNED SHUTDOWN, so they can better handle the busy summer driving season, and yet you still wanna point to this as a hazard so that you can bend me over and manhandle me every time I pull up at the gas pump.

Sheesh. There has to be a better way, and I'm not the tree-hugging, "I need a car that runs on D-cell batteries" type. These traders need the butt kicked. Why don't we start worrying about supply disruptions WHEN THERE ARE SOME!!!!!!!! That'd be like insurance companies increasing insurance premiums because they know that April is a rainy month and they think their drivers might have more wrecks.

For Whom the Drive Tolls

With the influx of people to outlying areas, I have wondered many, many times why Memphis and Shelby County don't do something that a lot of other major cities do--install toll booths at the county line. Obviously there is SOME desire to capitalize on these people who choose to live OUTSIDE of Shelby County, yet still seem it worthy enough to provide a living for them. Don't get me wrong, the city of Memphis isn't exactly a utopia, but such places like Lakeland, Collierville, Germantown, Arlington, and Bartlett all offer alternatives.

Recently there was a push to start a payroll tax. If you worked in Shelby County, you paid it. Supposedly it would've repealed a bit of the real estate tax. So if you were a resident, you'd be paying more from your paycheck but less for your property taxes--so it's a push. But obviously the people who don't live here would have the financial effect.

And here's the deal--these people really don't have a choice. Towns like Oakland, Hickory Withe, Olive Branch, and Southaven aren't big enough to provide jobs to all the folks who live there. In my office--a building of about 30 people--there are 4 people who live outside of Shelby County. And another girl's mom does, too. Of course, the most general argument you hear from the likes of them is, "Well, we're still spending money here." Yeah, we appreciate that 6 bucks you spend on lunch every now and then. Or that occasional birthday present you picked up at Target. But I'd be willing to bet that most of these people, most of the time, are buying regular stuff like groceries and gasoline right by their house--NOT in Shelby County. Let's assume that somebody spends an average of $20 a week here--food, junk at Target, etc. In 52 week's time, they've given exactly $88.05 to our tax revenue. Woooohoooo! Stuff the coffers, would you?!

Leah and I were at Wolfchase Galleria a week or two ago. It was amazing to walk down the aisle of cars and look at the license plates--Tipton County, Fayette County, Desoto County, etc etc. Geez, why aren't you people shopping in your own town? Oh yeah, that's right....there ISN'T anywhere for you to shop. So Memphis is good enough to provide a job and a mall for you, but not good enough to live in. And an occasional trip to the mall or stopping at our Exxon once a month doesn't really amount to the same thing.

So, let's put up toll booths. Inbound Hwy 64 from the likes of Oakland. Inbound on Hwy 14 (Austin Peay) and Hwy 51 from places like Atoka and Munford. And one of three things is gonna happen--a) they're gonna pay it, and we get the revenue, or b) they'll quit their job and it can be given to somebody who actually lives in Shelby County (or won't have problems paying to come here), or c) they'll move to Shelby County and pay taxes to the government where they work, like the rest of us.

House of Blues

Well, we got good news and bad news on the new house front last week, and the bad news seems to be the dominating factor right now.

First, the positive. Our builder, Reeves-Williams, likes to have pre-construction meetings before things get started. Up until now, everything's been a waiting game. We basically put a contract down long before building could ever get started--curbs were still being installed, MLGW had not yet done their thing, there were no addresses assigned to the lots, etc. So when the Realtor's assistant called wanting to set up a meeting, we were pretty excited. I kind of envisioned 2 or 3 builder's reps, seated at a conference room table type of thing--all introducing themselves and telling us how much they looked forward to a lasting client/builder relationship. In reality, it was one guy--the "foreman" of the job, who walked into the model home and unrolled a copy of the floorplan. He went over his copy of the selections we had made (countertop style, hardwood color, linoleum choice (as if we could remember what SC 834903 was!), and asked if we had any questions. No big deal. We also found out that our new address will be 11618 Milton Meadows Dr. So now we have a "real" identity instead of "lot 310." On Saturday, we drove out there and realized that our neighbor to the left is building a privacy fence, which means that it's less fencing that I have to put up. Hey, at probably something like 7 or 8 bucks per linear foot (to do it ourselves), any amount of fencing that we can utilize for free is worth it.

Now, on to the bad. When the prospect of moving began getting a bit more realistic, we obviously had to entertain the thought of selling our house. We have a listing agent (see also: ME), but we also brainstormed for ideas. My step-brother Tony was coming home from Iraq, so we mentioned the possibility to him. He was all for it--he gets a 1-owner house that's practically brand new, sold by sellers whom he knows and can count on the credibility of the info. We get to sell the house in a private deal, and everybody's a winner. Although we weren't looking for a commitment at the time, it was a "preliminary" commitment and started the ball rolling. Then we wrote up the contract, with the obvious "we must sell our house first" contingency. We had yet another discussion with Tony. Yep, he's absolutely on board--as soon as he gets his V.A. loan certificate from his base, we'd go ahead and proceed. We told him that if he wanted to go ahead and get an apartment, we'd pay the penalty to break the lease, since we wouldn't expect him to wait until July or later to get his own place. In March, he said, "I'm going up in April to get my stuff, and to help my buddy move down here. I'll have it all when I get back."

So after the meeting with the builder, I called Tony to let him know what the time scale was. They will most likely start the initial work in a week or two, and the house should be finished in 90-100 days. Tony is now in an apartment, and has a list of excuses a mile long as to why he doesn't want to buy the house. Keep in mind that for the last 3 months, our house could've been on the market (our contract was written 12/30/05). Tony's loan would be guaranteed as a veteran. So there are no credit issues or nothing at all about the house that caused Tony to change his mind--only flimsy excuses and our speculation as to the real reasons.

So now we have clean, paint, fix, scrub, replace, etc. to the point of making a listed house virtually perfect, something we hadn't planned on doing on such a short timeframe. It's not the work, mind you, it's just the time element. So my sign goes in the yard. And we have to pay a buyer's agent 3% commission--probably a little more than $3,000. And we have to deal with "We wanna show your house in 30 minutes" and "We want help with closing" and "We want the outside painted" and stuff like that.

Of course, the worst possible scenario in all of this is not being able to sell our house in time. After the new house is completed, the builder will probably give us 2 or 3 months after that to tie things up. After that, we'd probably have to forfeit the house. So the lot we picked out, the floorplan that we love, the measurements we've done, and the selections we've made would all be a waste of time. And our disappointment would be huge. So it's time to get to work, and hope for the best. Stay tuned.

Harley.....HUH??

Anybody else besides me scratching their head after seeing the latest Harley Davidson commercial, entitled Good Nights??

I saw it the first time, and kinda wondered if I missed something. So, with the convenience of TiVo, I rewound it and watched it again. I consider myself a reasonably intelligent person, but I guess some of the logic synapses (or whatever they're called) in my brain just aren't firing when I see that commercial.

The situation is this: It shows several ladies cutting their dates/evenings unexpectantly short with their man. One says something like, "It's getting late".......while the guy glances at his watch and notices that it's still light outside. Another darts out of the car while the guy stands there opening it, attempting to go for a kiss. Then, the final scene shows a house in the background, with noise indicating some sort of gathering, with a Harley parked on the street. The voice-over says something like, "It's different when you have a Harley." Huh? Did I miss something? Do all the women have Harley? Is it a group of friends, and everybody comes over to SEE the Harley? Oh well. If anybody got it, please enlighten me. Otherwise, I'll just chalk it up to the strange concepts sometimes produced by marketing folks. But I think I saw this on ESPN, so one would think that it wouldn't take a Harvard scholar to "get it."